I can't help thinking lately, reading over and over again about the wild and wreckless behavior of young celebrity Lindsay Lohan, the stories of the Olsen Twins dating men twice their age, Jessica Simpson's messy divorce and seemingly terribly unhappy public exploitation, and Britney's Feder-ma-ligned lifestyle - Where are their Moms?
Well...we can find these Moms/secondary agents at movie premieres, sidling up along their children's co-stars. And at club parties, dancing on banquettes, dressed up in the latest fashions, courtesty of their children's success and riches. And on vacation to exotic islands, gifts handed to them by the daughters that could not have reached their career highs without the love of Mom.
But, now that their children are being overexposed in magazines and have become daily, if not hourly, fodder for the scrutiny of the public and tabloids alike, where are the Moms? Do they even care? Or is any publicity a good thing?
When I think of Jessica Simpson's very public divorce from Nick Lachey, I immediately think of her father, Joe Simpson, a former preacher, who now walks the red carpets behind his daughter, wearing slick, metrosexual manwear, smiling from ear to ear, fully enjoying what his daughter's success has afforded him. But where is Mrs. Simpson? Is she at home thinking how to express to her daughter the (crazy!) idea that Jessica take a temporary step out of the limelight, if only to reevaluate her recent personal choices, and maybe, just maybe, sacrifice a little money for some happiness? Unlikely. But maybe that's exactly what Mommy Simpson (pictured shopping with a solemn Jessica) should be doing, with two star daughters in the public eye and a load of future therapy to be considered.
Take the Olsen Twins for example. Two girls who have basically never had a normal childhood and as a result, at the age of 19, are dating men in their thirties who own night clubs in NYC. What does Mom think of that?
Lindsay Lohan (pictured in South Beach with mom-manager in tow) is the saddest story of all of course. Her mother is the one always dressed up, accompanying Linday to movie premieres and celebrity hosted parties. A former aspiring star herself, it is easy to see what Mrs. Lohan values - money and fame. When Lindsay is sent to the hospital, not once, but twice, for exhaustion, you would think her mother would be the first person to say, how about a break, Linds? But, why be concerned with her first born child's health and happiness when she could be having dinner with Bruce Willis?
And Britney - poor Britney. I see her, a mess of foundation, rouge and chewing gum and I think, look how unhappy she is and she's only 24 years old! Maybe all the hit pop songs in the world aren't worth feeling like a miserable has-been when you're not yet old enough to rent a car.
So, where was Mommy Spears when Britney was being used by Madonna to preach Kabbalah? And where was she when Britney got married in Las Vegas, after a late night of drinking? And where was she when Britney began dating and later gave birth to the son of a former back-up dancer who was, at the time, with a girlfriend who was six months pregnant?
Wake up, Moms. Take that Juicy Couture jumpsuit and Swarovski crystallized Sidekick and give it a rest. Your children are worth their weight in gold. But only if you take care of them as well as the chains around your neck.